Reefs and myths single voyage
Psychology / / August 12, 2017
According to statistics, in the last decade, the number of unmarried women over 30 increased dramatically .Fortunately, this is no longer automatically mean getting into a list of old maids or single accident, and on the contrary, assumes the open doors in the vast world of new possibilities.Then what are we all afraid of?
Many of us, at one point, finding that "the love boat has crashed against life" and finding themselves completely to their own devices, terribly surprised and nervous doubt perfectly this very moment.We are so afraid to be alone, that they are ready to agree to any, even not suit our relationship.
Scientists from the University of Chicago have noticed that people who feel lonely, less sleep and wake up more often than those who do not suffer from this.Another study in the Harvard Center for Society and Health, found that single men are 53% more likely to have heart attacks than their peers with strong social ties.Even lonely colds 4 times more often, doctors of Science Carnegie Cent
And psychologists have made quite comforting long-term prognosis.In just 30 years, the institution of marriage faces the inevitable degeneration - it will be replaced by a series of monogamous relationships.Modern man seeks to permanently fix the state of the "young, independent, free."The average age of marriage for women has slowly reached to the level of 32 years.And the phrase "till death do us part" is now distributed in the best case on 9 years of marriage, and not fatal.
However, society is not so ruthless to the lone, still has not been fully outdated stereotype, if not the second half, you can not be a whole person.Everyone thinks you are unhappy and you willingly hang on the label, thereby programming a scenario of further development of its life. Divorce is a serious psychological test itself, carrying heavy, if your social circle consists entirely of "pairs with the experience" , with which you will inevitably compare themselves.Of course, the left one, you lose, and daily conversation for the evening tea, and regular sex, and the fact that during an influenza someone bring you aspirin.But what you get in return?The independence, the ability to manage their own lives and their own interests, which aptly articulated in the old Soviet film - "I want to eat halva, like carrots."
If the marriage does not bring satisfaction, and turns into an endless series of scandals, you really run the risk of their health. Loss of sense of intimacy in the family lowers self-esteem leads to stress and depression .Hence, a weakened immune system - you get sick, it is necessary only to someone in the subway sneeze, frequent migraine attacks, the problem starts with the intestines.In addition, resigned to the bad relations, you convince yourself, "I do not deserve better", thus depriving themselves of the opportunity to find happiness in the future.Do you really believe that it is not worthy of happiness?
Did you forget absorbed by the desire at all costs to save the crumbling marriage of a man who will be with you always, and you can rely on in all circumstances - about herself?If you feel good and comfortable in his society, and others will also want to get to know such a happy and harmonious man.
independence Do not doubt yourself
You do not need a partner to realize its significance.If you are alone, it does not mean that people think you are a failure.Do not take the relationship as a reward for good behavior.
Take responsibility for their own happiness.No one other than you, do not fill your life with meaning.Do not wait for the prince on a white horse - time is too precious to waste it.
Understand the practical aspects of their lives.You've learned that the husband takes care of the fact that the house is not flowing taps and lights were on, and the motor in the machine worked like clockwork.But you do not think that he was the only person on the planet who managed all this control?Ask for help from friends and experts - locksmiths, carpenters, electricians, and you will see that nothing serious.
Appreciate the freedom
Many people are afraid of change, but try to learn from them the maximum benefit.Spend a reappraisal.Are you satisfied with your job?You dream to learn to dance flamenco?You have a chance to do all that you do not have time.
Of course, the company is required each of us.However, it makes no sense to spend time with people who are unpleasant to you and suck out all the emotional juice, but would not be one.Real friends can be a lot, and "false" further devastate our lives.
Take a breather
absence of her husband did not deprive you the possibility to arrange a holiday.If the prospect to lie on the beach one does not seem so tempting, select your active rest.There are many wellness programs, hotels and resorts with a variety of health and beauty treatments - you do not have time to get bored.
Just a few questions - and you will learn whether this illness.
You do not have planned and apparently will spend Friday night alone.What do you feel?
- Relief.Watch TV and sleep enough before Saturday entertainment.
- disappointment.Unlike you, all around fun.
You need to cheer myself.Your choice?
- Suggest girlfriend or husband go to the movies, or have a cup of coffee.
- Buy a candy bar or a new dress.
How do you celebrate your birthday?
- invites friends and acquaintances and regale them with their signature dishes.
- any way.You do not like birthdays - or rather, your own.
you got promoted.Who can tell?
- best friend, her husband and her mother.
- No.As long as you pay on time for the apartment, it is not even interested in the housing department workers.
The shop windows are filled with Christmas decorations.You ...
- In anticipation of the holiday.What could be more beautiful New Year!
- annoyed.So much ado about nothing.
More answers A
You have strong social ties.Are you sure that family and friends are important, not less, than work and sports club.You harmoniously combine everything and do not miss alone.
More answers B
you alone.Have you recently moved to another city and lost their relatives and childhood friends?Even in this case, make new acquaintances is not so difficult.